The psychologist Aaron Beck identified ‘hopelessness’ as a key indicator of depression, associated with negative thinking and low self-esteem. Recently, a couple of my clients have specifically mentioned that they are experiencing ‘hope’ at the moment, and this is associated with an improvement in their overall quality of life. Obviously, I like to think that the counselling has helped them confront their worries and negative aspects of their self-image, which has increased their hope for the future. But it’s got me thinking about hope more generally.
Hope, as an experience, is linked to optimism, which is thought to be a fairly stable personality trait. But, although I would describe myself as a generally optimistic and hopeful person, there are times when I become pessimistic. Exploring the process of losing hope, I can identify that it starts with a negative thought or feeling – a worry, or a self-criticism, for instance. If I am deeply involved in something, the thought or feeling passes quickly. But if I am bored (doing accounts or other admin tasks I find a chore), it’s as if my mind will seize on the negative thought or feeling rather than concentrate on something boring! My mind will then get busy finding other examples of the same kind: if I’ve been worrying about whether a sniffle is the start of a cold, I’ll pay attention to other minor aches or pains …. Similarly, if I suddenly remember that I’ve forgotten to do something I promised, my self-criticism routine will focus on examples from 10 years ago if nothing more recent pops into focus.
I’ve found that once I recognise what’s going on – one of my brain subroutines is running on automatic – I can switch it off. Doing something, even if it is not directly related to the worry or self-criticism, also works to make the brain switch tracks. For someone who is seriously depressed, a more intensive programme of challenging negative thoughts, building self-esteem, acceptance, and a belief in one’s ability to make changes in life (self-efficacy) will be needed. But even people experiencing severe depression can learn to rebuild hope. And techniques that can help reduce depression are also helpful to shift a temporary loss of hope.
Two other particularly useful strategies are:
- reminding oneself of the 80/20 rule: it’s healthier to focus on the 80% of things we’ve done adequately rather than the 20% that were inadequate
- building in things to look forward to.